Cleansing

New Year’s resolutions are effective until I give in to my inclinations.

Indulging in chocolates, stressing about things I can’t control, watching videos instead of reading, sleeping rather than praying, or buying those fashionable workout shoes—I can’t be resolute about changing my thought processes, habits, activities, or social circle unless I have a new heart.

Fortunately, Jesus says, “Behold, I make all things new,”” so I looked to Him to transform my heart. Our conversation went something like this:

I heard Jesus calling out to me,

“Can we hang out and talk about what’s in your heart over coffee?”

“Oh no,” I thought as resistance paralyzed me. Is he going to do a heart audit?

Before answering, I took a mental inventory of what I was keeping in my heart. To do that, I had to push aside my stress from work to think straight. It’s been weighing me down since last November. I can’t sleep well thinking about it. 

Suddenly, an aggressive, prickly creature, the size of a kitten, leaped at me.

“Ouch,” I screamed in pain. “Who are you?” I demanded.

“I’m your anger from your sister’s nasty comment last Christmas gathering,” the creature growled.

During the family reunion, my sister reminded me of how I was all about myself when we were teenagers, and I’ve taken it to heart. That creature had been feeding on my resentment and had grown.

Then, jeering laughter broke my thoughts. Scared, I asked, “Who are you?”

“Don’t you recognize me? We make fun of people’s flaws. Look at you. It’s so funny how Miss Courage turns into Miss Cowardice. Hahaha!” she sputtered in between uncontrollable laughter.

Meanwhile, rodents of different sizes scurried around. They were Worry, Pride, Offense, White Lie, Technology Idol, Envy, Ungratefulness, Regret, If-only. 

Once again, I heard Jesus’ voice, “Would you instead figure out your concerns yourself? Or do you want to discuss them over coffee? Give me your heart. I long to fix it. Don’t let it be troubled nor be afraid.”

Disrupted, I replied, “Yes Lord, tell me, why my heart? I can give you some of my time and a little money. I can even work for ministries.”

Jesus explained, “Your heart is my tabernacle, or dwelling place, ever since you trusted me for your salvation. But your heart is divided, and you are still the boss of it. I long for you to love me with your whole heart, mind, and soul. A heart that treasures good things makes a good man.”
​
“So my heart is evil and unfit for a Holy God?” I objected.

“Behold, I make all things new,” (Revelation 21:5 NKJV). “I can make your heart new if only you’ll let me,” Jesus assured me.

Curious, I asked my Lord, “Why do you dwell in people’s hearts?”

Jesus told the story.

“God walked with Adam and Eve every day in the garden of Eden. But since man disobeyed God when he ate the fruit of the tree of good and evil, sin separated man from God. Since then, God had been longing to fellowship with man again. He expressed this yearning when He asked Adam and Eve, ‘Where are you?’ ”

The thought of a  Holy God longing for a sinful man brought tears to my eyes. I knew this verse by heart but didn’t read God’s yearnings between the lines. Jesus’ voice broke as tears slid down His face. He wept with me as He said,

“I’m the lamb that was slain before the foundation of the world, God’s only provision to bridge man back to God. My work is finished. But, the Father’s chief concern has always been to establish a dwelling place with man.

“Remember, after God delivered His people from slavery in Egypt, before traveling through the wilderness, He spoke to Moses, saying:

“ ‘On the first day of the first month, you shall set up the tabernacle of the tent of meeting,’ (Exodus 40:1).

“God wanted to encamp with the Israelites. He met up with Moses at the tent of meeting, then Moses delivered His Word to the people. God ensured that His people were guided, guarded, and physically close to Him. Imagine, during the day, God led the Israelites as a pillar of cloud so His people would be protected not only from sunburn but from enemies. At night, God manifested as a pillar of fire to provide light and direction. What miraculous provisions God gave His people when He was in their midst. And this can be true today if I abide in you and you in me. You will bear much fruit and be a light in this dark world.”

I was awed as I imagined witnessing a significant population of people traveling headed by a pillar of cloud or fire. Regardless, I managed to ask another question, tongue in cheek.

“But that was during the wilderness march, which may no longer be relevant today, right?”

Jesus replied,

“Your world today is no different from the wilderness then. If anything, it’s more dangerous. You desperately need my lead, not as a pillar of cloud or fire, but through my voice speaking in your heart. If you give me your whole heart, my desires will be yours, and my will, your resolve. You’ll look more and more like me. But first, let’s drive out the monsters of bitterness, critical attitude, pride, and the ogre that wants to control everything. This is the first step to making your heart my dwelling place.”

​So I finally said, “Amen.”

At the beginning of 2022, let’s listen to what God has been telling us and known about us. Surrendering to His absolute control will result in a new focus and a new set of priorities. We can’t really plan for ourselves during these uncertain times. Let’s face it, you woke up to the same world of 2021 last New Year’s Day. Same pandemic. Same fears. Same confusion. Same distractions. Same baggage carried over in 2022. Jesus warned us that we’ll continue to face difficulties in this world and is asking us to live in it trusting Him.

​But we first need to make room for Jesus in our hearts. Would you let Him?