Grumbler 2.0

My name is Christina, and I'm a grumbler. In my last post, I expressed how I feel like I walked out of the pages of the book of Numbers.
So, in my imagination, God zaps me back in time to be with the bunch of Israelite grumblers where I belong? There I would be, a meal offering to the bugs the size of my fist. I'd be wilder than the untamed animals that I'll probably scare away because of my relentless screaming "yuck," "ewe," "ugh," and "ouch." I'll act worse than Job's wife as the bars I'll get would not be on my gadgets but on the sand. Out of despair, I'd probably brew mother nature's pine needle tea in a desert boil of slimy water to dunk my share of manna. #Necessity is the mother of invention. And #Addiction will find a way. Every hour, I'd ask, "Moses, are we there yet? What does God's Positioning System (GPS) say our ETA is? I wouldn't be attentive to the divine sunscreen, God's cloud during the day, and the pillar of fire at night. I'd be complaining without ceasing, so I won't reach the Promised Land like the hundreds of thousands of grumblers who died in the wilderness.
 
But here I am, alive, blessed with a happy family, good health, and a lucrative job, albeit challenging. I dwell in a comfortable home beyond the reach of bugs and wild animals. My internet is giga-fast, and I enjoy bottomless tea and coffee of my choice, not to mention chocolates that give me a dopamine rush. 
 
More than my scary imagination, the realization of God's boundless grace drove me to reflection and repentance. It's astonishing how swiftly I can lose sight of my Father's countless blessings when life takes an unexpected turn or when challenges loom large. When circumstances diverge from my expectations, it's often tempting to perceive the guiding hand of fate as one that has dealt me misfortune.
 
While I'm grateful God didn't exile me to the desert with the grumbling Israelites, I have a wilderness to traverse. Everybody does; it's that inhospitable terrain unique to every person laid out in the pilgrimage of life.
 
The wilderness I traverse is unlike most people's. A pilgrim without sight, I wake up every morning to a never-ending game of "hide and seek" where I'm always "it." Navigating the world is like trying to assemble a puzzle without a picture – sure, I've got the pieces, but good luck figuring out if it's a puppy or a giraffe! I'll never forget when I was a commuter and how crossing the street was always a heart-pounding adventure. I felt like a Samurai brandishing my white cane of a sword at speeding cars to reach the workplace or the coffee shop without being a traffic statistic. Rest assured, you'll hear more of my adventures in the future. For now, I'd like to talk about the wilderness in my job.

At work, I rely entirely on assistive technology's wonders to perform a job, which was God's answer to my prayers several years ago. However, the existing assistive technology often struggles to keep pace with the ever-evolving nature of our workplace. The system limitations impede providing a resolution for my customers promptly and efficiently, degrading my performance. I could have been a corporate superhero without the kryptonite of system limitations. Needless to say, I spend most of my life at work, a minimum of eight hours a day on my computer and sixteen hours feeling the impact of stress.
 
Perhaps your wilderness is passing through financial hardship or hurdling unemployment. It could be a relentless battle against a terminal illness. You may be tangled in the thorns of prodigal children or a challenging marriage. But make no mistake, every battle is in a wilderness of sorts, and our natural reaction is to grumble, kick, and cry our way to freedom, break down, or throw in the towel. Our response to these arduous wilderness experiences is to avoid them at all costs.
 
In our quest to escape the trials of our wilderness journeys, let's consider a radical notion: What if we were to wholeheartedly embrace the wilderness? This untamed terrain has the power to transform our very essence, for it compels us to be wholly dependent on our Heavenly Father.
 
True liberation emerges when we relinquish control and place our unwavering trust in the hands of God. It is precisely during these trying times that our Lord unearths His most profound revelations.
 
Wasn't Moses raised in the desert to lead the Israelites out of slavery to the Promised Land? He wouldn't have met the angel of the LORD who appeared to him in flames of fire from within a bush if he weren't in the desert tending his father-in-law's flock.
David spent a lot of desert time hiding out from Saul before God made him king.
John the Baptist lived in the desert and lived on yucky locusts...
And our Lord spent forty days in the desert praying and fasting before His official ministry. It was also where our perfect Savior overcame temptation.
 
The crucible of my wilderness experiences melts the scum from my heart – the negativity, ungratefulness, joylessness, etc. so my praising software will be updated to the latest version.

But he knows the way that I take; when he has tried me, I shall come out as gold. Job 23:10

In the heart of every wilderness, there lies a purpose, God's grand design. It may not always be clear, and the path may be treacherous, but rest assured, there is meaning to be found in every step of your journey.